Just felt like sharing some old photos…
I sat this picture on my little Winnie the Pooh’s lap. Ok, I know you’re wondering – why does a grown a*s woman have a little Winnie the Pooh? Well, the story goes that my maternal grandmother (I didn’t get a chance to get to know her), nicknamed me her, “Little Pooh Bear.” And so this past week, I saw the Winnie the Pooh at a gift shop and said, “Why not?” I feel like it keeps me connected to her. And I know as an ancestor she is walking with me and guiding me every step of the way on my journey.
I had some big glasses on back in the day. Now, I have several pairs of reading glasses like Fred on Sanford & Son. A different pair for different reading needs. LOL And by the way, I loved that dress with the hearts on it. That was my favorite dress in the whole world back then.
How about that pose, people? Hands on the hip. I still stand around like that as an adult with my hands on my hips. I wish I still had that picture of my maternal grandmother that was on her obituary. The family used a photo of her with her hands on her hips in the exact same position as I am in this picture.
By the way, let me honor my grandmother by stating her name – Helen Geneva Henderson, she made her transition from this lifetime on May 10, 1977. Even though, I was five years old when she passed, I still didn’t know her that well. I don’t remember anything about her except her funeral. I remember seeing her in “the box” as I called it back then. I remember asking my mom why she and everyone else was crying. She told me that grandma went to Heaven. I asked if she would come back and she said, “No.” Then I started to cry and made a vow to never go to another funeral…ever!
My mom (Helen’s daughter) passed on February 14, 2008 a;nd my dad (they had been divorced for a long time) passed on March 18, 2008. I did not go to their funerals.
I have fought with this for a long time since their transitions. And the truth is…it’s a new day…a new chapter in the journey of my life. I have to surrender it all and stop fighting with it. I know in my heart I did the best i could when they were here…living, breathing, surviving, and at times, thriving. I surrender it all. Open and ready for this new day…this new beginning that stands before me with open arms saying, “Um…so Tameko, can I get a hug?” And I run towards it like a child running through a field of sunflowers.
And to my grandmother, mother, and father, all I can say is the African proverb, “I am because you are, since you are, therefore I AM.”